Another appointment...another surgery

Yes folks, it is true.  Julia is having another surgery.  This is her third eye surgery and her fourth time under anesthetic.  One time under anesthetic was an EUA (exam under anesthesia) and ear tubes.  That doesn't count as surgery, or does it?  Heck, I am counting it.  My brave girl has been through too much.  She deserves every badge of honor she can get.

So here is what happened.

A few weeks ago, I noticed that her right eye was starting to turn in again.  I would stare and stare and try to get her to look straight at me to see if it would turn.  I convinced myself that I was just being a neurotic imom.  Then when our daycare provider mentioned that she had seen her eye turn, I knew I wasn't being neurotic.

So I called her normal eye doc.  The call I got back from the nurse was that he would feel more comfortable if I saw the doc that did her surgeries.  That makes you feel good, doesn't it?

So we went.  We saw an eye muscle specialist and then the surgeon.  The consensus was that it was time for eye muscle surgery (strabismus surgery). 

Insert imom freak out right here.

I have this bad habit of not panicking until I leave the doctor's office and stew on the info for about 24 hours.  I think in the office I am just shell shocked at hearing she needs surgery and can't even think of what questions to ask.  So I followed up with an email to her regular eye doc (who assured me that her surgeon is awesome and talented and he trusts him) and then called the nurse to ask a few more questions.

Now I am satisfied that she needs the surgery and it is the right time, just nervous about my baby going through this again.

You see, the other surgeries she was 9 weeks, 5 1/2 months and 9 months.  So I just handed her over.  She wasn't really clingy yet.  Don't get me wrong.  It is still amazingly hard to hand over your baby knowing that she is going under anesthetic.  But, I know this time she will freak out.  Hopefully I can walk her back so she isn't traumatized by being carried away by a nurse.

I am also happy that the recovery for this surgery doesn't require an eye shield or intense drops.  That is a relief.

So she is scheduled for Feb. 5th.  We will go the week before for new measurements (they measure the degree of turn to know how much to adjust the eye muscles).

I have already decided that she needs new pj's and a new lovey for surgery day.  She deserves something for going through all this craziness.  She may not understand presents, but I know she will like a new, soft lovey.

After surgery she will get checked for a new prescription and probably get new glasses.  And we will keep patching and patching.  (hopefully we will leave patching hell soon)

So mark your calendars and say a prayer for us on Feb. 5th.  And afterwards she will look straight at me with both eyes!

Can you tell I am trying to be the "positive, I'm not scared at all" Mom?  I may be keeping it together outside, but inside I am terrified.